All Gave Some. Some Gave All.

All Gave Some. Some Gave All.

Memorial Day is a day for reflection, dedicated to the memory of those who have died in service for our country. In my opinion, it is our obligation as a country – and as United States citizens – to never forget their achievements or sacrifice. And we should also remember the sacrifices of their families.

I will carry the memory of those who died while we served together with me always. Their accomplishments were many and their sacrifices were great.

I plan to cross post this list to the Dixon Center for Military and Veterans Services Facebook page, which we’ve turned into a virtual Tribute Wall for Memorial Day. Greywolf, you will never be forgotten.

Operation Iraqi Freedom

3rd “Greywolf” Brigade Combat Team

1st Cavalry Division

Oct. 2006-Dec. 2007

(in order of life given in service to their nation)

1SG RICKY MCGINNIS ◊ SPC KENNETH HAINES ◊ SFC SCHUYLER HAYNES ◊ SGT MITCHELL MUTZ ◊ CPT JOHN DENNISON ◊ CPT RHETT SCHILLER ◊ SSG DANIEL MORRIS ◊ SGT JAY GAUTHREAUX ◊ SPC TROY COOPER ◊ CPL JOHN BARTA ◊ CPL JONATHAN SCHILLER ◊ CPL RICH SMITH ◊ SPC STEPHEN RADERSTORF ◊ SPC RYAN BERG ◊ SSG GREGROY WRIGHT ◊ SPC NATHAN FAIRLIE ◊ MAJ ALAN JOHNSON ◊ SPC ERIC SIEGER ◊ SPC CLARENCE SPENCER ◊ SPC LEEROY CAMACHO ◊ SSG ALAN SHAW ◊ SSG ERIC ROSS ◊ CPT DONNIE BELSER ◊ PFC BRANDEN CUMMINGS ◊ SGT JOHN RODE ◊ SGT CARL SEIGART ◊ SPC RONNIE MADORE ◊ SPC JEREMY BARNETT ◊ SPC RYAN RUSSELL ◊ SPC BLAKE HARRIS ◊ PV2 BARRY MAYO ◊ SPC ADAM ROSEMA ◊ SPC STEPHEN KOWALCZYK ◊ CPL BRIAN CHEVALIER ◊ SFC BENJAMIN SEBBAN ◊ SPC ANTHONY KAISER ◊ PFC JASON NUNEZ ◊ SGT JASON SWIGER ◊ PFC ORLANDO GONZALEZ ◊ PV2 ANTHONY WHITE ◊ SPC JASON SHAFFER ◊ CPT JONATHAN GRASSBAUGH ◊ SPC EBE EMOLO ◊ SPC LEVI HOOVER ◊ PFC RODNEY MCCANDLESS ◊ 1LT PHILLIP NEEL ◊ SGT JESSE WILLIAMS ◊ SGT BRICE PEARSON ◊ SSG WILLIAM MOORE ◊ PFC JERRY KING ◊ 1LT KEVIN GASPERS ◊ SGT KENNETH LOCKER ◊ SPC RANDELL MARSHALL ◊ SPC MICHAEL VAUGHAN ◊ PFC MICHAEL RODRIGUEZ ◊ PFC GARRETT KNOLL ◊ PFC JEFFREY AVERY ◊ PV2 MICHAEL PURSEL◊ SPC MATTHEW ALEXANDER ◊ SPC JOEL LEWIS ◊ SPC ANTHONY BRADSHAW ◊ SGT JASON HARKINS ◊ SGT VICENZO ROMEO ◊ SPC DAN NGUYEN ◊ SPC JASON VAUGHN ◊ 1LT ANDREW BACEVICH ◊ SGT ANSELMO MARTINEZ ◊ SPC JOSHUA ROMERO ◊ SPC CASEY NASH ◊ SGT IOSWIO URUO ◊ SPC ALEXANDER ROSA ◊ SPC FRANCIS TRUSSEL ◊ SPC ZACHARY BAKER ◊ SGT ANTHONY EWING ◊ SPC JAMES SUMMERS ◊ PFC ALEXANDRE ALEXEEV ◊ 2LT KILE WEST ◊ SGT JONATHAN MARKHAM ◊ SGT DARRICK DEHN ◊ SGT ANDREWS HIGGINS ◊ SSG TIMOTHY COLE ◊ PV2 SCOTT MILLER ◊ SPC DAMON LEGRAND ◊ SPC JOSIAH HOLLOPETER ◊ PFC DARRYL LINDER ◊ PVT MICHAEL BALOGA ◊ SSG JOAN DURAN ◊ PFC WILLIAM WARFORD ◊ PFC DANE BALCON ◊ SGT TERRY WAGONER ◊ SPC TODD MOTLEY ◊ PV2 CHRISTOPHER MCCLOUD ◊ SPC JONATHAN RIVADENEIRA ◊ SPC NICHOLAS OLSON ◊ SPC DONALD VALENTINE ◊ SPC JOSEPH LANDRY ◊ PFC LUIGI MARCIANTE ◊ SPC DAVID WATSON ◊ SSG KEVIN BROWN ◊ SSG DONNIE DIXON ◊ SPC VINCENT MADERO ◊ CPL ADAM CHITJIAN ◊ SPC JERMAINE FRANKLIN ◊ SPC CHRISTOPHER KRUSE ◊ SPC PETER SCHMIDT ◊ SGT KENNETH BOOKER ◊ SPC CHRISTOPHER NELSON ◊ PVT MARIUS FERRERO ◊ SPC JASON LEE

A War Widow Reflects on Memorial Day

A War Widow Reflects on Memorial Day

Saturday morning I got up early to take our son to football practice. At 9:15 there was a knock on the door, and I figured it was a neighbor.

But it wasn’t.

The 29th of September. 9:15 that morning. That’s when I learned my husband had died in Iraq.

________________________

No matter how many years pass, it’s never easy. Memorial Day, a day of remembrance for our fallen service members, is never easy.

I find that people who don’t have a connection to the military tend to think of Memorial Day as a long weekend with barbeques. And that’s okay, as long as they also keep in mind that this is a day to honor our men and women who have sacrificed their lives so that we can have those barbeques.

In my experience, it’s not that people forget. People want to care. But I believe that they don’t really understand (and to be fair, it’s hard to understand when less than 10% of our country has served in uniform) what it means to get that knock on the door and hear about the sacrifices that our loved ones have made. It’s my hope that by sharing my story, and perhaps some of my pain, that it helps to bridge that gap.

I’ve grieved. But the most important thing I want to tell people is that I don’t grieve any more. Rather, I honor.

I don’t wait until a holiday comes up to recognize those who have fallen – and the families of the fallen. I feel these service members – and the families who are left behind – should be recognized daily. We shouldn’t wait for a particular day to honor them.

It is every day that we should honor them.

I’m often asked how to do this. It’s not too hard. Just say “thank you.” Don’t wait for a special day or a time that “feels” appropriate. I don’t think people understand how powerful a simple spoken expression of gratitude can be for those of us who are Gold Star family members – someone who has lost a loved one to military service.

When I’m introduced as a military widow, people offer their condolences for my loss. May I make a suggestion? Please add, “And thank you for all that you’ve given up for this country.”

I know it can feel uncomfortable. I understand. That’s why I’m sharing my story, because it’s not as simple as what you may see on TV. If you talk to me, you’ll have a better sense of what is happening. And, you may not realize it, but you are helping every person to heal when you allow them to tell their story.

Even 12 years later, it’s hard to go back and reflect on what happened. I don’t like to go back but there is purpose in knowing that this will help people better understand the real impact of Memorial Day to the families left behind.

And so I leave you with this: every day is a time to honor veterans, those in uniform, and families of soldiers. It’s appropriate to say “thank you.” You know those signs “If you see something, say something?” The same is true for all of us touched by military service.

Stop…really stop. If you have time, ask if you can sit down with them. But above all, just give an honest “thank you.” Your heartfelt words will mean more than you will ever know.

This column originally ran May 22, 2019 via Inside Sources. [link on Inside Sources to: www.insidesources.com]

About the Author

Latrese Dixon is the Blue and Gold Star Family Partner for Dixon Center for Military and Veterans Services, the non-profit that is named for her husband. SSGT Donnie Dixon was killed in action in Iraq in September 2007. 

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This story was also shared on the following news outlets:

NEW YORK NEWSDAY (Long Island)

https://www.newsday.com/opinion/commentary/memorial-day-service-members-iraq-sacrifice-1.314209

HOLLAND (Michigan) SENTINEL

https://www.hollandsentinel.com/opinion/20190526/latrese-dixon-war-widows-thoughts-on-memorial-day

ROANOKE (Virginia) TIMES

https://www.roanoke.com/opinion/commentary/dixon-a-war-widow-reflects-on-memorial-day/article_3729eece-a534-5f4a-ab47-84466f8e1874.html

CHARLSTON (South Carolina) POST-COURIER

https://www.roanoke.com/opinion/commentary/dixon-a-war-widow-reflects-on-memorial-day/article_3729eece-a534-5f4a-ab47-84466f8e1874.html

PALM BEACH (Florida) POST

https://www.palmbeachpost.com/opinion/20190526/point-of-view-war-widow-reflects-on-memorial-day

DAILY INTER LAKE (Montana)

https://www.dailyinterlake.com/letters_to_the_editor/20190526/a_war_widow_reflects_on_memorial_day

CAPE COD (Massachusetts) TIMES

https://www.capecodtimes.com/opinion/20190527/war-widow-reflects-on-memorial-day

MONROE (Michigan) EVENING NEWS

https://www.monroenews.com/opinion/20190526/latrese-dixon-war-widows-thoughts-on-memorial-day

fREDRICKSBURG (Virginia) FREE LANCE-STAR

https://www.fredericksburg.com/opinion/commentary-what-to-say-to-war-widows-on-memorial-day/article_4942b31a-6501-5038-8c20-0ad3cf8167c8.html

DAILY TELEGRAM (Michigan)

https://www.lenconnect.com/opinion/20190526/latrese-dixon-war-widows-thoughts-on-memorial-day

THE ALLIANCE (Ohio) REVIEW

https://www.the-review.com/opinion/20190527/commentary-war-widow-reflects-on-memorial-day?template=ampart

THE DAY (New London, CT)

https://www.theday.com/op-edguest-opinions/20190526/war-widow-reflects-on-memorial-day

THE TIMES AND DEMOCRAT (South Carolina)

https://thetandd.com/opinion/columnist/a-war-widow-reflects/article_9a5ae48e-a799-5a64-88b7-1919824d1689.html

SENTINAL-STANDARD (Ionia, Michigan)

https://www.sentinel-standard.com/opinion/20190526/latrese-dixon-war-widows-thoughts-on-memorial-day

LAS VEGAS SUN (Nevada)

https://lasvegassun.com/news/2019/may/27/a-war-widow-reflects-on-memorial-day/

THE LIMA NEWS (Ohio)

https://www.limaohio.com/opinion/columns/357481/opinion-a-war-widow-reflects-on-memorial-day

GV WIRE (Fresno, California)

https://gvwire.com/2019/05/27/opinion-a-war-widow-reflects-on-memorial-day/